Thoughts on Marriage

First off...NO I'M NOT MARRIED!!!!!! This is not an attempt to give advice. I have recently been discussing with my significant other and friends and so I thought I'd blog about my thoughts on having a successful marriage. Right or wrong theses are just my thoughts.

1. Keep God as the head of both of your individual lives.
1. Even before you get married, both people should have God at the head of their life. It is hard to have God as the head of your marriage if you haven’t made Him Lord over your personal life. Even if both people are not at the same “spiritual level”, both should have a good understanding that God is most important and number 1.
2. Respect each other.
1. There has to be mutual respect for one another. No matter who makes more money, no matter what the current profession is, etc. First and foremost there has to be a genuine respect for one another. No two people are alike. So there maybe things that you don’t understand about the other person, but understanding isn’t the most important thing, respecting them is. Try your hardest to understand them or “to get” them and if that doesn’t seem to work, resolve to respect that difference.
3. Open Communication
1. It is very important to have open communication in a marriage. Each spouse should feel comfortable turning to their spouse about anything. When things come up in your life, after God, your spouse should be the first person you turn to. Communication does not just pertain to bad things or things going wrong, but good things, when something amazing happens to you, you should feel open and free to discuss these things with your spouse. There should be equal opportunity to listen/respond to each other. No one should know more than you about what is going on with your spouse!
4. Support
1. Each spouse should genuinely support one another. Not just financially, but emotionally, mentally, etc. When one side is up or down the other side will follow suite. You should always be your partners open ear and arms. Be there for each other, it’s in your vows!
5. Have fun.
1. So many times couples forget one of the most important things in a marriage…fun! After the kids, and the mortgage, bills, work, age, weight gain, etc. we perhaps put aside that very important aspect. We have to take time away from all the seriousness of life and laugh a little…or a lot! Don’t forget…and if you have, take time to remember…what makes your spouse laugh. Think of what you used to and still enjoy doing together.
6. Quality T.I.M.E
1. Don’t forget to put some time aside and shut out the world and spend time together…alone. Maybe go out or just talk, not about the kids and finances... but about life, your relationship, take a trip down memory lane. Or watch a movie together while cuddling. It’s up to you! Just cut out some time to be alone…maybe a little romance!!!

Romans 7:14-25 (NLT)

¹⁴ So the trouble is not with the law, for it is spiritual and good. The trouble is with me, for I am all too human, a slave to sin. ¹⁵ I don’t really understand myself, for I want to do what is right, but I don’t do it. Instead, I do what I hate. ¹⁶ But if I know that what I am doing is wrong, this shows that I agree that the law is good. ¹⁷ So I am not the one doing wrong; it is sin living in me that does it.
 ¹⁸ And I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature.^[d] I want to do what is right, but I can’t. ¹⁹ I want to do what is good, but I don’t. I don’t want to do what is wrong, but I do it anyway. ²⁰ But if I do what I don’t want to do, I am not really the one doing wrong; it is sin living in me that does it.
 ²¹ I have discovered this principle of life—that when I want to do what is right, I inevitably do what is wrong. ²² I love God’s law with all my heart. ²³ But there is another power^[e] within me that is at war with my mind. This power makes me a slave to the sin that is still within me. ²⁴ Oh, what a miserable person I am! Who will free me from this life that is dominated by sin and death? ²⁵ Thank God! The answer is in Jesus Christ our Lord. So you see how it is: In my mind I really want to obey God’s law, but because of my sinful nature I am a slave to sin.

One of my favorite scriptures. It so good to read this on a regular basis.

Ecclesiastes 5:1-7(NLT)

 “As you enter the house of God, keep your ears open and your mouth shut. It is evil to make mindless offerings to God. Don't make rash promises, and don't be hasty in bringing matters before God. After all, God is in heaven, you are here on earth. So let your words be few. Too much activity gives you restless dreams; too many words makes you a fool. When you make a promise to God, don't delay in following through, for God takes no pleasure in fools. Keep all promises you make to him. It is better to say nothing than to make a promise and not keep it. Don't let your mouth make you sin. And don't defend yourself by telling the Temple messenger that the promise you made was a mistake. That would make God angry, and might wipe out everything you have achieved. Talk is cheap, like daydreams and other useless activities. Fear God instead.

Just thought I'd share...Share your thoughts on this verse.

Valentine's Day...Remember Love!!!!!!!!!

Yep, it's v-day! It's here. The day so many men (and even some women) dread. A lot of people for one reason or another dread this day. The reason that I've heard so much over the last few years is people feel that you shouldn't need a date on the calendar to tell someone you love them. They feel forced to by flowers, cards, candy, jewelry, etc. They gripe and complain and run to the local 24hour drug store to pick up a simple or mushy card and a box of chocolate...blah blah blah! Well, last year I was almost convinced that this holiday should obsolete!!! But I had a mini epiphany if you will. We all have busy lives, with work, or children, bills, whatever. We may be married or have relationships, but our lives are plaqued with so much "-ness" busyness, sadness, broken-heartedness,  and many other things that can keep our minds occupied. It may not be intentional but maybe with all the things we have going in our life, we don't stop and appreciate love. We all know that we shouldn't wait until February 14th to show or express your love. But lets face it, life doesn't always afford us the opportunity to give that time. We all should make the effort. But, with all the hustle and bustle of every day life, we do have a day on the calendar, that reminds us to stop and show that special someone that we love them. February 14th simply affords us the opportunity to remember love. A co-worker of mine recently lost her husband, unexpectedly. We hear everyday about people's live being turned up side down from tragedy and pain. Having a date set a side to remember love, can be beneficial to our lives and to our relationships. On Thanksgiving we remember to be thankful, on Easter we remember our salvation, on Christmas we remember, the gift of Jesus, on anniversaries we remember that day of our wedding or commitment, on birthdays we remember or recognize a special person. So why does Valentine's day, a day to remember love, get such a bad rap? If it's because of the money being spent...don't spend any money. The idea is to remember love, not how much you spent. Maybe if people stopped equating love to dollar amounts it would mean more.

To everyone who reads this...Happy Valentine's Day and please...Remember Love!!!

Romans 10:5-15

Romans 10: 5-15
"For Moses writes that the law’s way of making a person right with God requires obedience to all of its commands. But faith’s way of getting right with God says, “Don’t say in your heart, ‘Who will go up to heaven’ (to bring Christ down to earth). And don’t say, ‘Who will go down to the place of the dead’ (to bring Christ back to life again).” In fact, it says,“The message is very close at hand;
it is on your lips and in your heart.”And that message is the very message about faith that we preach: If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is by believing in your heart that you are made right with God, and it is by confessing with your mouth that you are saved."

These verses are so powerful. I never really realized how much until last night. This verse is more than just something to recite or teach our children. This verse to me is the validation of my salvation. By confessing or acknowledging that Jesus Christ is Lord/God (a person who has authority, control, or power over others; a master, chief, or ruler) I am saved and because I believe it I am made right with God. It's so simple, yet so powerful. But we have recited it so long, we sometimes lose/forget its meaning. But my dad brought it back to my remembrance last night! God is good.

Here's the rest of the verses:
As the Scriptures tell us, “Anyone who trusts in him will never be disgraced.” Jew and Gentile are the same in this respect. They have the same Lord, who gives generously to all who call on him. For “Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved. But how can they call on him to save them unless they believe in him? And how can they believe in him if they have never heard about him? And how can they hear about him unless someone tells them? And how will anyone go and tell them without being sent? That is why the Scriptures say, “How beautiful are the feet of messengers who bring good news!”

Being Saved...

Being saved and being a Christian is about more than just going to church every Sunday, reading your bible everyday, and never doing any wrong. Those things are good and we should strive to do those things, but those things only come as a result or the impact of the relationship that you have with God and with Jesus Christ. Being saved is about Romans 10:9-10 which says, “If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is by believing in your heart that you are made right with God, and it is by confessing with your mouth that you are saved”. This verse validates that you are saved. The act of confessing or acknowledging that Jesus Christ is Lord (a person who has authority, control, or power over others; a master, chief, or ruler) I am saved. And because I believe that this is true, then I am made right with God. It's so simple, yet so powerful.
So here is a salvation check list:
1. Do you believe in your heart that God raised Jesus from the dead?
2. Will you/have you confessed with your mouth (said out loud) that Jesus is Lord?
If you answered yes to both of these questions…guess what? YOU ARE SAVED…and you don’t have to question it again! People sometimes struggle with how simple it is. They feel like it should take more than that, but that’s it…that’s all!!!

Dear Lord,
I admit that I am a sinner. I have done many things that don’t please you. I have lived my life for myself. I am sorry and I repent. I ask you to forgive me. I believe that Jesus Christ is your son and that Jesus died on the cross for me, to save me. You did what I could not do for myself. I come to you now and ask you to take control of my life, I give it to you. Help me to live every day in a way that pleases you. I love you, Lord, and I thank you that I will spend all eternity with you.

In Jesus Name,
Amen

Being a Christian is about following Jesus. The word Christian means Christ-like. Not being perfect but everyday trying and striving to live a life that is pleasing to God. First remember: 1) no one gets it all right all the time 2)you will make mistakes 3) most important, God loves you through it all, the good and the bad. Know this: God is the only person who knows every single thing about you, knows everything you’ve done and said (good and bad), and loves you anyway. Romans 8:38-39 “I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord”. Meaning there is nothing that we can do that will make God stop loving us. He is our father. And like any good parent He loves us, no matter what. You may not like what your children do, they may lie, they may misbehave, disappoint you, disobey you, hurt you, but because they are your child you love them anyway! God has a plan for your life. "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future” (Jeremiah 29:11, NLT). He wants you. One of the most important scriptures is John 3:16 because this is where the foundation of our salvation is. It says “For God so loved the world that He gave is only begotten son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” A simpler version says “God loved the people of this world so much that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who has faith in him will have eternal life and never really die”. There are 3 key parts in that verse: everyone, faith, and never really die (eternal life). Everyone means just that, everyone. Jesus died for every single person, whether they believe in Him or not, whether they love Him or obey Him or not. Faith is “the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen” (Hebrews 1:1) meaning faith is having confidence and believing that what we hope for will actually happen because God will provide; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see. In other words we may not see it but we still believe it! Eternal life, according to John 17:3 Jesus says (while praying to God) “And this is the way to have eternal life—to know you (God), the only true God, and Jesus Christ, the one you sent to earth.” Eternal life means that even though we physically die, we will live again in heaven.

You Just Never Know...

Life is one of God’s most precious gifts. Actually it’s probably the most precious one. It’s the gift that makes all the other ones possible if you will. But what I am contemplating today is what happens when that gift is gone…unexpectantly? We have it one day we use it, play with it, we live with it. And then one day as we are going through our day…it’s gone. Just like that. Eyes closed. Breathing stopped. Being no more. What then? We are never really ready to hear those words or face those facts. For a while it is almost as if it is a dream, the fact that the gift is gone. People are born everyday and they die everyday. What always seems to plaque my mind is...that person.  Before they die…what was there last thought? What was there last word? What about the last thing they saw or heard? How about the minutes before? For those who die in a car accident, can you imagine when they place their hands on the handle and open the door? Or as they are driving down the road just before they hit that final curve? We always hear in these unfortunate situations, “You just never know…”. Seems like I hear that from dozens of people per situation. But what does that mean, “You just never know”? It always seems like people give it a brief thought in that moment and then it vanishes until the next time and then they say “You just never know”. But what do you do with that…the not knowing? How do you cope with it? Make sense of it? How do you handle the “you just never know” moments in your own life? What if in just that moment God allows the clock to pause? He gives you 60 seconds to ponder your life, the last thing you said to your spouse or a parent? Did you apologize for hurting your friend? Was that 20 year grudge against your sister worth it? Did your child really know just how much you really loved them? Well, I haven’t been in that situation, obviously, so I don’t know if you get that moment. But what I do know is at that moment…its too late, because at the end of those 60 seconds…well you know the rest. This morning the Holy Spirit said to me, sometimes you never know how precious life is until it becomes a memory. Stop for a moment, perhaps 60 seconds, and ponder your life. More importantly, ponder your relationship with God. Could it be better? (for ALL, the answer is yes). What do I need to work on or clean up? We all should come to realize this gift is from God and he controls it. God plans the date of birth and the date of death. He gives us the dash between those dates. What are we doing with them? Ephesians 5:15-16 says “Therefore be careful how you live -- not as the unwise, but as wise, making the most of every opportunity...”